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Culture of Self

by Dan Jacob Wallace

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1.
Counting 01:16
2.
The Heap 05:58
give it to the heap, give it up to the beast the things you will see, the things you’ll believe every time you have the chance it happens every day, then it goes away then you think of those yesterdays knowing that you have done everything though you know, and it shows you’re still thinking of the missing link it’s important that you realize that for you and me it won’t change, you’ll see one of us is gonna’ be sorry punished until he or she has bled embarrassed in front of the friends who made us some of us will be given parties raised up so far we forget the ground embellished like some kind of clown sometimes we have to go where everyone is or at least where everyone’s been sorry for confusion and sorry for delusion and sorry about the voice in your head so give it to the beast, give it up to the heap the things you will leave, the things you’ll delete every time you have the chance it happens every day, then it goes away then you look back on yesterday wondering what you might have to say when they know, and it shows you’re still thinking of the missing link it’s important they don’t realize that there’s a scheme, we’re the same you’ll see one of us is gonna’ be sorry punished until he or she has fled embarrassed in front of the friends who made us some of us will be given parties raised up so far we forget the ground embellished like some little town inhabited by clowns sometimes we have to go where everyone is or at least where everyone’s been sorry for confusion and sorry for delusion and sorry about the voice in your head just listen to the beast calling to you from the heap the things you will think, the things you’ll repeat given just a fleeting chance it happens every day, then it goes away come on, it’s time to go where everyone is or at least where everyone’s been sorry for confusion and sorry about delusion and sorry there’s a voice in your head when you become the beast, living there beneath the heap the things you will eat, the people you’ll keep every time they have the chance it happens every day, till you sink away
3.
Naturally 03:43
naturally there are some questions now answer them i shall best as i know how but let’s not get carried away there’s a time and place for everything let’s remember what we become when we try to be the things we know we’re not if i could i would i promise you naturally i knock on plastic wood if it is a matter of time it is a conflicted and twisted circus mime if it is a matter of fame take another number but with a better name in the meanwhile there are things to do like making lists of things to never do if it is a matter of love sometimes it’s a dragon and sometimes it’s a dove if it is a matter of wealth spread it like a secret you can’t keep to yourself do you wanna’ know what’s behind my self-control? do you wanna’ see what’s behind the scenery? it’s not me in the meanwhile there are things to do like making lists of hunches and of clues if it is a matter of fate maybe it’s just running very very late if it is a matter of death don’t ask me ‘cuz i have not tried it yet do you wanna’ know what’s behind my self-control? do you wanna’ see what’s behind the mystery? it’s not me
4.
I Want to Be 04:11
i want to be something that you want to keep hidden where everyone sees but only you can reach like memories that rock like seas inside you put up on pedestals of heart and bone beneath your thrones they’ll find me fantasies in frantic frenzies rip me from limb to limb, then put me back again i want to be what you see when you believe everything you see in me but no one else can reach like melodies an ancient grecian left us then when the spacemen come with fine-tooth combs in crumbled stone they’ll find me sitting here the daydream saves me from the mundanity of the monotony then when the spacemen come with xiphoid tongues in crumbled stone they’ll find me quiet gazing may seem lazy but lucid daydreams are what make the day a maze
5.
wonderful show, such thunderous foes under-lairs tremble deep below they cheat all day, then turn, run away closer, closer, closer to me, me… is it a fire? is it a second chance? give us a fire give us a second chance, we will pull you through none left to save who are not to blame resurrection’s killing everything so why pray for life to learn how to fight? clinging, screaming, waiting for me, me… is it a fire? is it a second chance? give us a fire give us a second chance, we will pull you through give us a fire, give us a second chance, give us a fire give us a second chance, we will pull you through
6.
The Low Road 03:18
i don’t mean to profit off of other people’s pain i’ve been here for so many years attempting to forget her name i don’t mean to benefit from others’ misery i’ve been here for 10,000 years attempting to regain my strength oh, it’s hard to be so cold we don’t like to ride the high of other people’s pride we’ve been here for too many years pretending to have our own lives we don’t wish to get so rich off honest people’s sins we’ve been here for 10,000 years not doing but witnessing oh, it’s hard to grow old even though we chose the low road won’t be long before we don’t belong is it wrong just to stay here? just to be here? just to breathe here? oh, we don’t care if we’re right or if we are wrong even though we can’t deny it, somehow we will justify it it’s the way we chose to go through life we don’t care if we stay here if we leave here, if we stay here oh, we don’t care if we win or if we sin if we win, if we sin, no… one day we’ll have our own holy place
7.
8.
Ode 88 04:44
starlight reaching through the night zigzag smile kissing me goodnight scrap heap wings and rusted strings obey the laws of harmony, summertime’s a young man’s fling sunlight racing after me learn to fight foes i’ll never meet look at him play martian hymns about a life of innocence, summertime’s a young man’s whim i’ll give you all we have for just a little piece of you i’ll keep it clean and warm, i’ll give it back when i am through a little bitty piece would do, i know you’d do it for me too smokin’ their lucky reds and dressed up like silhouettes they look good, only they won’t get to fill the hole inside the never-ending appetite tokin’ their tight roulettes and playing with twin brunettes they’ll look good till the bitter end, they watch the time go by they don’t get a reason or a why sometimes when i’m all alone i think of life back when i was young ’88 was so great, i thought it would not ever end summertime’s a young man’s whim i’ll give you all we have for just a little bit of you i’ll keep it clean and warm, i’ll give it back when i am through a little bit of you would do, i hope you’d do it for me too help us to understand and help us to rock the band yeah help us to give a damn before we are too late we don’t wanna’ miss another day turn us into shooting stars then teach us how to play the parts then take us to a place that’s far away from where we are tell us who to be and who we are
9.
no, that’s not a lover’s gaze that’s staring so blankly through the hazy red clouded remains of a night filled with rage no, i couldn’t know its name, it wandered into my optic blame, you know i had to take aim: it didn’t know its own shame you think i’m wrong to be sure of a way to eliminate such pain but when you’re alone, and i promise you will be then you’ll be on my side oh, when did the summer end and when did this hate begin? it’s worn me so thin, like a razorblade twin, ah… no, that’s not a lover’s mane that’s scraggling between rocks and broken veins why won’t it just wash away? it’s been down there for days no, i couldn’t count the squares, they formed underneath their broken spells i wasn’t there when he fell, so don’t blame me for hell you think i’m wrong to be sure of a way to eliminate such pain but when you’re alone, and i promise you will be then you’ll be on my side oh, when did the summer end and when did this hate begin? it’s worn me so thin, like a razorblade twin, ah… oh, when did i first give in to all of these hopeless whims? oh, when can we start again? but this time i want to win it’s worn me so thin, like a razorblade twin, ah…
10.
Insomnia 05:13
pop your nightly pill, it’s dark and static-filled slowly you dawn upon yourself a light so bright you melt, slowly you flow back to your head, a river stuck in bed treading the wake of brainwave mistakes and now the midnight bird will sing of the things that no one sees she’ll stitch a map across your eye so you could go there every night where does it begin? where does anything begin? if you let her in, your brass eye will see again i don’t want to be, don’t want to ever been don’t want to try, don’t wanna’ hear or think of here or there, i just wanna’ drift to live in mist, to spread out like a myth finding lost thoughts wherever they are and then the midnight bird will sing of the troubles she has seen i’ll let her implant me with scenes watch them grow through me like bones that’s how it begins, sometimes colors turn to plans oh, what a release when a sound turns into me and when the midnight bird has sung of the things no one has done i’ll let her in, i’ll be her host i’ll be her shell, i’ll be her ghost oh, morning is long, more than half of him is scarred oh, morning will cry if he learns how much i hide
11.
12.
Capsule 03:39
i’m just as scared as you are, almost as bold twice as cold, we’ll melt together one and one make twenty-million lifetimes stretched out like a smile year to year unleery leers become a circle, how’s it feel now? how’s it feel? there’s no room left to share between us! how’s it feel now? how’s it feel now? no room left for air between us! oh, it feels right there are impulses all around us, laughter and waves of hazy days, we’ll build a capsule: glass and plastic, clasped elastic spastic and fecklessly we’ll go in this dome till we roll into a pinhole, how’s it feel now? how’s it feel? there’s no room left for air between us! how’s it feel now? how’s it feel now? no room left to spare between us! oh, it feels right living in a dusty image with a tree whose limbs are endless in a meadow like a snow globe nine dimensions are all we know, oh… how’s it feel now? how’s it feel now? no room left for breath between us! how’s it feel now? how’s it feel? there’s no room left for flesh between us! oh, it feels right, it is right living in a dusty image with a tree whose limbs are endless in a meadow like a snow globe nine dimensions are all we know, oh…
13.

about

“Put simply, Culture of Self is about daring to be different, and the magic that comes when you do. Even if it were only half as good as it is, it should be treasured for its originality alone.” – Americana UK

credits

released June 10, 2007

Dan Wallace: vocals, guitar, various other instruments, songwriting; George Lawler: drums; Robin Morgan: vocals on "I Want to Be"; Emanuel Ban: violin, viola on "Counting" and "Counting Backwards"; Grace Hong, oboe on "Counting" and "Counting Backwards."

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Dan Jacob Wallace Milwaukee, Wisconsin

Dan Jacob Wallace is a composer, songwriter, and guitarist currently based in Milwaukee.

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